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Sunday, October 28, 2012

What's yes and what's no

I was bored waiting for people to skype me
Finished my anime already

Nothing much in my life.
Leading somewhat a busy, at the same time routine life.
As busy as i said i am, i think commitment plays an important role.

Gotten my official 1st month of pay.
Honestly, how should i feel? or I should say, what should I be feeling?
I don't know to be exact.

I still remember the times during high school and university,
we compare and wish each other the best in their future,
we critic like some experts on other's decision on whether in acceptance towards certain treatment during their working experience.
we promise to ourselves that we would not go "that" way as it is not fair in terms of 'qualification'

Now naive was that.

I would have to say that I wasn't satisfied at all with the amount paid to me.
But what can I do more?
Is this the correct method to go through with my life.
Will this decision really brings me to where I want to be in future.

People kept telling me that I'm putting too much expectation in myself
and that i should keep myself updated in the reality life.
what is reality?
am I not living in a reality life already.

Does this mean that I'm rushing over?
but I cant resist comparing myself with others peers of mine.

I would have to say, I do compare myself with others a lot and that pressured me.

Sometimes I even feel that I shouldn't be treated this way, in the end its the material that counts right?
Is that a thought of naive? I wouldn't know.
all i know now is that I really wish that 2013 would be far better than 2012.

As much as I feel really humiliated, I can't do anything rather than endure. Is this the correct way?
I wouldn't know, i guess the best thing that i can do is to put on the similar face that i put on everyday.


signing off.

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