I've not posted anything for quite some time.
Didn't find the need to write anything special since with all the up & coming Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat convenience.
Life's been good.
Nothing much drastic happened other than me cutting my hair and all. (yeah, i chopped it)
Broke up, fallen to the 'it's complicated' relationship, got out and the cycle is continuing?
(i'm not really sure myself)
I've known a few good friends, buddies and brothers!
Met some bastards along the way, and still am meeting some.
Should i still say that Life's still good? Yea, i shall. It's part of the learning process.
We gain experience by learning some good and bad.
Took the chance to draft this post because I need somewhere to vent my emotions.
So when i read back in the future, I can laugh at it myself.
In June, my favourite music was Kat Dahlia's I think I'm in Love,
This month's favourite music was Martin Garrix and Bebe Raxha's In the Name of Love.
I hate myself being played and chess-ed around. After countless times i tell myself NOT TO FALL.
Ask me if i still LOVE?
Sometimes I thought to myself, why did i make decisions like that, why i didn't try to give them the second chance to actually prove it to me.
Did i not be patient enough to wait? But again, what am I supposed to be patient about?
Am i too strong-headed? did i slowly forcing my expectations?
Honestly, I cant remember.
Did i really move on? I'm not sure. All i know is I'm lost, VERY LOST when i lost him.
Did i regret letting him go?
No. I didn't.
All i know, I didn't let him go cause I didn't love him, but I felt my love for him gradually changed which at the same time I don't see myself having a future with him.
I miss having him being there 24/7 whenever I'm unhappy.
I miss him putting me in his utmost priority
I miss him letting me vent all my emotions good nor bad at him, even if he didn't do anything wrong
I miss him trying to please me all the time.
I know he loves me dearly, treats me like a princess.
I know i won't be able to get anyone that love me as much as he did.
That aside, its the past already. I can't change what is past.
Suck it up Sslynn!